Why a Hunchback is No Slouch

Posted on by masercot
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Quasimodo watching his contact lens fall two hundred feet to the square below

[I’ll be frank here:  I’ve got a mild hunch to my back that make me look like a question mark talking to a period.  I always look as if I’m going to challenge whoever I’m talking to to a wrestling match.  But, there are also benefits to having a hunchback.  And, they are:]

If some nut indiscriminately fires into a crowd of people you are part of, you have already “pre-ducked”.

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If you ever manage to twist your head one hundred and eighty degrees, you have a place to rest your chin.

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Victor Hugo fans will often buy you drinks.

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Some people “settle” for buying irregular shirts… you rely on them.

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Directors will line up to cast you in horror movies just as soon as the 1940s come back around.

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No one ever admonishes you for acting “cocky”.

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When your son rides on your shoulders, he can double up with one of his friends and maybe a cooler full of juice boxes.

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You can appear on Sesame Street as the letter ‘C’; or, on Greek Sesame Street as a capital gamma.

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If you decide to take up dance, as least you know you can’t look any more ridiculous than Bob Fosse.

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You can confound body-language experts…

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14 thoughts on “Why a Hunchback is No Slouch”

      1. Like a writing prompt, sometimes what comes first to the mind is the best, but we tend to reject these firsts in the hope of bettering ourselves.

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Published by masercot