Scrambled Eggs: A Rant

Nothing is important; but, it is of utmost importance that we THINK things are important. I know you’re thinking that I just let the cat out of the bag… how could you go through the charade of thinking things were important when you’ve already been told that they aren’t? You would be living a lie and I’d be somewhat, albeit not legally, responsible. You can live your life as if everything is important or as if nothing is important. Either way, you get the same result. I, personally, take the middle path. I’d buy the cow even if I was getting the milk for free, then, I’d pay the cow for the milk… not in money of course… but apples, the currency of bovines… I assume. I’ve never seen a cow eat an apple, but I cannot imagine a cow turning one down, either; because, when is a cow going to get a shot at another apple? Men are like that: A bra-less women walks past us going in the opposite direction and we HAVE to look because our lizard hind-brain says, “You’ll never get this chance again” (despite the existence of the internet). It doesn’t matter that the glare of our wives or girlfriends are burning holes into the sides of our heads. And, when they punch us for staring at another woman, that is the woman’s lizard-hind brain saying, “Man bad must punch”. Two lizards, walking through the mall… And, for that instant, something is actually important.