Perchance to Dream

Nightmares and Night Terrors in Preschoolers - HealthyChildren.org

I dream in color, which is a waste because I mostly dream about penguins, zebras or nuns.

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Before I go to sleep, I read a few pages in a German dictionary; that way, when I have nightmares, they are in German so I don’t know what’s going on.

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I don’t believe much in dream symbols. Sometimes, a baboon with your grandmother’s face and a dildo for a tail is just a baboon with your grandmother’s face and a dildo for a tail.

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They say, if you put a piece of wedding cake under your pillow, you’ll dream of your future spouse and the person who will be helping get the ants out of your ear.

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Psychologists think that recurring dreams are the brain just working things out. Even the Bible has a case of it. The dream told to Joseph was just the Pharaoh working out his witnessing of cow cannibalism.

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One of the most common nightmares is being at school nude or in your underwear. I’ve had that dream but most of the other students were distracted by Grandma Baboon Dildo.

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Writers use the technique of some section of their work being “all a dream”. To keep readers/viewers from getting upset at this cheap trick, just add little “clues” so you can blame the reader for not picking up on them. You know… like The Sixth Sense

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Philosophers often use “Is life a dream?” as a commentary on how little we know of reality. But, I know life is NOT a dream because there would be more penguins, zebras and nuns.

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Freud and Jung thought that people dreamed in code that had to be interpreted. They thought that determining the meaning of the dreams was a long and exhaustive process. This is important because it allowed psychoanalysts to buy larger homes, sometimes with swimming pools.

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A lot of psychologists think that day-dreaming can actually be constructive, unless you are performing surgery or driving a bus at the time.

19 thoughts on “Perchance to Dream

  1. I had a dream the other night where I was riding on this cartoon train – like 1930’s kind of animation – and the conductor was driving the train like it was a horse almost, smiling real big and scooping kittens from behind him and placing them in windows of homes he drove past.
    I really wanted to put the cat that lives under my bed on that train. And guess what?! It was in black and white!

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      1. I think I got the cartoon thing from D who loves to play the videogame Cuphead. But there are no cats in the game – just neat animation and weird spooky smiles.

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  2. “Life is a dream” is indeed a big cliche, but is it cliche because it’s true? Certainly, as part of a plot it is overdone, but I’m old now and still waiting to wake up. I think Jeff Goldblum had the best line on this subject in the movie, “The Fly.”
    “What if I was really a fly who dreamt I was human?”

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  3. “I had a wonderful dream last night — don’t miss it.” –Groucho Marx

    Now he tells us!

    P.S. His dream was no doubt in black-and-white and probably funnier than yours, but your dreams are in color and you don’t have script writers, so you da man.

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    1. I keep telling you: S. J. Perelman wrote for him!

      Seriously, if you can get some of Perelman’s writing, you’ll see similarities in their humor. Perelman used to watch the brothers on stage in New York when he was younger. I’d imagine writing for the Marx Brothers was a dream come true for him…

      Yes… Groucho’s dreams were probably funnier than mine. His roast of Johnny Carson was funnier than anything I’ve ever written.

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