Covid and Vaccine Myths

Reappraisal: Karl Malden's sorrowfully sincere performance in 'A Streetcar  Named Desire'

Garlic can Cure Covid: It is true that garlic can keep you from getting covid if you eat enough of it that no one will want to get close to you; however, the only thing garlic has ever cured is a bland marinara sauce.

Wearing a Face-Mask will Push the Covid Virus into Your Brain: Wrong! But, a mask WILL push covid into your nose giving you “covid nose”… a syndrome that makes your nose look like Karl Malden’s. This will create a lifetime of horror as people everywhere walk to you and ask, “Weren’t you in A Streetcar Named Desire?”…

Colloidal Silver Can Cure Covid: The only people colloidal silver ever cured has been gullible people of having too much money.

George Soros Owns the lab in China where Covid was Created: Sadly, people get the lab in Wuhan confused with Soros’ undersea lair where he is currently breeding thousands of colobus monkeys to run amok in cities and explode on command.

Covid-19 is a Man-Made Bio-weapon: This one MIGHT be true; because, we know that military superpowers are always looking for weapons that kill two percent of those they use it on…

A Tennessee Nurse Who Had Her Injection on TV, Died from it in Hours: Cause of death is often tricky. Sometimes other conditions might contribute to a death in ways that are hard to quantify; however, the nurse is still alive so determining the cause of her death might be more than a little speculative at this point…

Covid Vaccines Contain Tissue from Aborted Babies: This is completely baseless. The vaccines do not use aborted tissue; however, they do use the tears of children as a solvent.

Covid Vaccines are Mostly Graphene Oxide Says University of Almeria: First, the good news: There actually IS a University of Almeria. The researcher that made the claim, Pablo Campra, used an electron microscope and came to the conclusion that what he saw kind of looked liked graphene. Graphene Oxide implies nanobots, which is ridiculous because governments introduce nanobots through our drinking water.

The Vaccines Contain Luciferase: That’s right! Satan himself will be inside your arm if you get the vaccine. Actually, the FDA checked the ingredients and found no Luciferase; however, they did find copious amounts of Hitlerium…

More People have Died from the Covid Vaccine than from Covid Itself: The claim was 611,000 deaths. After thorough investigation, that number went down to zero; but, that number could double at ANY time!



23 thoughts on “Covid and Vaccine Myths

      1. You might get your ass kicked as well. Now question, are we getting a Charlie Watts inspired posts to honour the great man?

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      2. Well, THAT ruined my morning. I didn’t know he’d died. He was my favorite of the Rolling Stones… He always looked like he was kind of separate from it all…

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  1. Everybody knows the way to avoid getting Covid is to get the Loch Ness monster tattooed to your right forearm. My kids are all enjoying having “Nessie Wars.” The wars are annoying but at least they are safe from Covid!

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  2. I knew I had felt like Satan had slipped into me as soon as I got the vaccine! I have only gotten one dose, does that mean I’m only half possessed?

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