Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
You notice her jeans are stained with brake fluid. ♫ She moves most of the household poisons to her spice rack. ♫ You are camping in grizzly country when you notice your down vest smells like salmon. ♫ You ask about your severed brake-lines and your husband promises to explain it, “after you eat your […]
Read More Signs Your Spouse Wants You DeadMary Mallon was born in County Tyrone, Ireland in 1869. County Tyrone is tucked away six miles from the Gyth Byrre River under the shadow of Wyvern’s Neck Rock in the valley of Pthgard Hagan. Little is known about her parents. Historians are pretty sure they lived above-ground, breathed air and could reproduce sexually. Also, […]
Read More Mary Mallon, Infectuous personalityArtificial intelligence is a lot like having children. You feel like you REALLY want kids; but, when the first one is born, the only emotion you feel is an existential horror knowing you’ll be supporting this human well into their forties. We looked forward to artificial intelligence with that same emotion. It was going to […]
Read More Artificial IntelligenceWhat are the disadvantages of eating gold? Your bowel movements will be worth more than you are. Plus, you’ll confound the x-ray machine at the airport and they will be forced to pat you down. Before a long flight, a little groping really hits the spot… What were the Little Rascals previously called? Fetuses. How […]
Read More Google Questions/Charlie AnswersUse the pennies to make puppet faces to use for a puppet show. Possible plot: Abraham Lincoln and his wife, Abraham Lincoln, invent a cloning machine to create an army of Abraham Lincolns to defeat the evil genius, Abraham Lincoln. ☺ Pennies are the perfect size for coasters at the next tea party you hold […]
Read More What Will We Do With All Those Pennies?
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 