Ask a Super-Intelligent Bio-Engineered Dog Part 2

Q. My boyfriend and I have been living in a pretty harmonious relationship until recently. Lately, he seems upset, volatile, angry for no good reason and frankly, it is driving me and my new pet alligator up the wall. A. It seems that your boyfriend has all of the symptoms of sudden-onset Post Traumatic […]

So, You’ve Found Out Your Boyfriend is Gay…

[Thanks to chattykerry for inadvertently giving me the idea] Remember, there is no shame in your boyfriend being gay. There is, however, plenty of shame in your not knowing your boyfriend is gay. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that you were such a bad girlfriend that your boyfriend turned, romantically, on all women. Homosexuality […]

Some Thoughts on Flight

On my recent trip to Lubbock, my boarding group was ‘9’. Being in Group 9 is like being in that building that they have at the leper colony where they put people they consider beneath them. It’s not just a prestige thing. Nines are last to board. And, just as in running en masse […]

Thoughts are Acorns to the Squirrels in My Head

How long do you have to wait between breaking and entering before they are considered two different charges? Like, if you kick in someone’s door, then come back a week later to rob them? I followed the Brett Kavanaugh hearing VERY closely, heard both sides of the argument, but I still don’t think he should […]

The Twelve Step Program for Bears

Admit that you are powerless over your need to knock over and eat from garbage cans. Admit that there is a power greater than yourself who can keep you from knocking over and eating from garbage cans. This power may come in the form of a locking trashcan lid or a park ranger. Turn […]

The Tao of Woof

[How to understand your dog] A low growl: “I disagree with your contention that I should not lay on the couch” A low growl followed by a whine: “Your unyielding position on the issue of me lying on the couch has me concerned as to your mental state” A whine, followed by a howl: “Please […]

Tips on Breast Feeding

Breastfeeding burns a lot of calories, especially in conjunction with other exercise; For example, if you breastfeed while mountain climbing, you can lose up to two pounds a day… ten, if you drop the baby. A suckling child can tighten up the uterus immediately after childbirth which is the least he can do. The size […]