Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
“I [hmm] you, too” ♀ “Great! That’s all I need…” ♂ “And, I think you are… good… too?” ♀ “I’m flattered that you feel so strongly about me that you would embarrass both of us like this” ♂ “I love you but not in that way or at all” ♀ “Love is just a chemical […]
Read More Ten Responses to a Premature “I Love You”Stopping right away is a sure sign you are guilty. ♣ You only have to drive until your blood alcohol content is back within legal limits. ♣ They won’t catch you because only YOU know where you are going. ♣ Fleeing the police is a great way to meet other law enforcement in surrounding counties. […]
Read More Why You Should Run from a Police Traffic StopI felt sorry for myself because I had no feet; then, I met a man with no eyelids and I suddenly realized why he looked so surprised when we met. ♠ I felt sorry for myself because I had no money; then, I met a wealthy man who, despite all of his riches, would never […]
Read More I Felt Sorry for Myself… (an Exercise)[Ways to Beat this Heat Wave] Construct a crude quilt out of fudgesicles… ☺ Invite a glacier to stay at your home for the weekend. ☺ Put a desk fan in your oven, turn it on and then turn the oven down to forty-eight degrees. ☺ Become best friends with an ice-sculptor. ☺ Whip up […]
Read More How to Keep Cool on a Hot DayNever do a handstand in a cow pasture. ֍ If a deal sounds too good to be true, it probably is, but take it anyway; because, WHAT IF IT’S TRUE??? ֍ Always come in first. If you can’t do that, destroying the bicycle of the kid who DID come in first is just as good. […]
Read More Advice I Gave to my Sons
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 