A big fat juicy limerick

A forgetful old man of Iraq, wrote poetry books by the stack. His memory was such that sometimes he would forget he was writing poetry entirely and, instead write in a prose form that was both beautiful and lyrical. It flowed from his pen like spring water coming from the depths of the Earth […]

Fears, Anxieties and Dreads

I worry that people will see my laugh-lines and assume that I’ve had it too easy all my life. When I go to a urinal and someone else walks up at the same time but finishes WAY before I do, I worry that I might be peeing wrong. I’ve got a gnawing anxiety that […]

Futile Acts of Voter Fraud I’ve Committed

On my registration form, I deliberately didn’t capitalize my street name. Next to my vote for my desired candidate I wrote “times infinity”. It probably didn’t accomplish anything but, when it does work, it will DEFINITELY ensure that my candidate wins. I started a rumor on Facebook that one of our local bond issues […]

The Unerring Accuracy of Photons

One of the most beautiful naturally occurring objects is the photon. They are born inside stars when a hydrogen atom lays its eggs. Two hydrogen atoms mate to form a helium atom and once consummated, they mate for life. But, the photon has a long journey ahead of it. Because it has to fly […]

Secrets I Will Never Tell

When those around me recite the preamble to the Constitution, I usually just mouth along until we get to the part about “liberty and justice for all”. When I use a public restroom and someone is in one of the stalls, I will pretend to wash my hands by turning the water on and […]

Real Recent Discoveries in… SCIENCE!

The Journal of Analytical Chemistry reported that moss can be used to inexpensively detect pollutants in the air. An hour later, Donald Trump’s EPA made moss a controlled substance… An international team of geoscientists and paleontologists have discovered more evidence that Alaska acted as a “dinosaur superhighway” from Asia to North America in the […]

Poetry is Bad; at Least Mine is

Short History of India Nehru ran the government of India’s subcontinent When Gandhi was no longer handhi. Not an optimist H. G. Wells found that writing about the future sells But like a playwright from the ancient Greek that future had to be bleak