In Praise of Older Women

Older women are no longer looking for “Mr. Right” or “Mr. Acceptable”. They are looking for “Mr. Anybody Because My Last Egg is about to Drop”. I am that anybody! As I get older and tire more easily, older women sleep less and have more energy; because, menopause is nature’s methamphetamine… Older women like to […]

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In Praise of Younger Women

With younger women, there is far less likelihood of a conversation about her clogged bile duct. A younger woman can use your rambling, go-nowhere stories of your youth in her history class. Younger women make great “trophy wives”; but, never EVER have one engraved. A young girlfriend destroys the confidence of your ex-wife to the […]

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Ask a Genetically-Modified Bio-Engineered Super-Intelligent Dog: The Final Epilogue

Dear Genetically-Modified Bio-Engineered Super-Intelligent Dog, Despite my prohibition against pets, my son found a stray beatnik while playing with friends in a vacant lot a few blocks away. We kept him in the garage and nursed him back to health with cups of espresso; but, now that he’s better, he refuses to leave. He just […]

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