Foods that Everyone Likes

Pancakes: Whenever I finish eating pancakes, I ask myself, “Why don’t I eat pancakes every day?”. The answer is simple: Pancakes are a calorie-bomb that few people can work off in their daily job. Lumberjacks can, but I’ll never be a lumberjack because I’m not a transvestite… ☻ Sirloin Steak: I like my steak seared […]

Narcolepsy: Living the Dream

Narcolepsy is a condition that causes sudden REM sleep in the sufferer. It shouldn’t be joked about… unless the narcoleptic is in a bar with a carrot in his ear… then, he’s just asking for it. ☺ If someone you live with is diagnosed with narcolepsy, at least you’ll have the comfort of knowing you […]

The Gorilla Who Didn’t Understand Adages

Gorilla Bob sat at his security desk scanning the store’s monitors. He loved his job as head of security at D-Mart. He’d been at it for fifteen years and had been acknowledged by corporate many times for his wisdom and acumen. Behind him, a door opened. “Morning, boss!”, greeted his assistant, a grey mule deer. […]

Maple Syrup and Maple Sugar

Maple syrup is made from the sap of three different species of maple tree. The trees are bled for weeks but not allowed to die… kind of like the middle class in the United States… ♥ Maple Syrup is expensive. It takes fifty gallons of tree sap to make a single gallon of syrup. On […]