As they walked into Maude’s Inn, Goober Partridge and Kossov Dith gave contented sighs. “What great hamburgers!”, exclaimed Partridge. “And, that coffee!” “And, the onions, fried until almost brown…” “Yum!”, agreed Kossov. There was a pause… “Do you have any Imodium?”, asked the great detective. Kossov opened his case. “I’ll see if there is enough […]Read More My Mystery, Cha Nine
Dear Bio-Engineered, Genetically-Modified Super-Intelligent Dog, I know that my husband hasn’t paid his income taxes in years. If I turn him in, I hear that the IRS will give me a portion of the money they recover. This money would be very helpful in paying some of our bills and getting our life on track. […]Read More Ask a Bio-Engineered [blah blah blah] Dog
I am the darkness in that I’m not particularly light. When I see my neighbor, he calls out, “Hey, Charlie… are you still the night?” and I have to remind him that, no, I’m the darkness… because I’M PURE EVIL. Then, the says, “Cool” and invites me over to play cards that night. I accept […]Read More I AM THE DARKNESS!!!
Urination: Obviously, not all urination; but, urination where it doesn’t normally occur: Such as the carpet, the stove top or Haiti. Vocalization: As in rapid and/or high-pitch barks or yelps. If the dog vocalizes, “I’m chill, bruh”, it’s probably not panicking and is more likely a surfer. Trembling: Uncontrollable shaking is a sign of CPD. […]Read More The Symptoms of Canine Panic Disorder (CPD)
Come When Called: This is probably the first thing you’ll try to teach a dog. REMEMBER: Smart dogs do NOT come when they are called. They are exploring the world. Why should the dog come to you when you call it? It already KNOWS what you smell like. Heel: Training a dog not to move […]Read More Thoughts on Dog Tricks