Thanksgiving Hacks

Make your turkey a week ahead of time, then eat it and tell everyone Thanksgiving is canceled. ☼ Hors d’oeuvres can be made easily and quickly if you have Greek olives, Gryere cheese, crackers and an experienced chef who knows what to do with those things. ☼ Salad can be made faster if you break […]

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Stuff I’m Thankful for Part 2

I’m thankful for Byzantine architecture because, without it, a lot of Turks would’ve had to sleep out in the rain. ☻ I’m thankful for my children because they can be used as collateral in large drug deals. ☻ I’m thankful for turnips, especially the one that unclogged my bathtub… although, on reflection, that might have […]

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Thoughts on Vegetables

Artichokes are very versatile. They can be boiled, roasted, baked, deep fried, smothered, shot or run over when they stand in the crosswalk. They are the perfect vegetable for when you crave something that looks like a pine cone and tastes like nothing. ♦ If you must break out of jail, you can carve a […]

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Bitter FAQs about Capers

Where do capers grow? Any of the arid regions around the Mediterranean where there is so little food that people pick flower buds and pickle them because there is little else to eat. How are capers harvested? In the morning they are picked manually by local virgins.  By hand, because they are fragile. In the […]

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