Lurid Facts about Blood

You have enough blood in your body to feed over seventy-five thousand mosquitoes; knowing this, I imagine you’ll still selfishly keep it to yourself for the most part… Mature red blood cells do not have nuclei. This is why they are constantly being laughed at by amoebae… Dogs have at least twelve blood types. DNA […]

Fun Things to Do at the Doctor’s Office

Take a lot of blood pressure medicine before your appointment. That way, when the blood technician tries to get a sample, it will take forty five minutes. Try to talk the doctor into prescribing heroin. Let everyone go ahead of you until the very end of the day, then, when they call you to come […]

I Go Dark: Thoughts on Euthanasia

Fatalists have no problem with euthanasia because, if you are euthanized, that is when you were slated to die anyway… unless you weren’t, then you can’t… it’s really quite simple… total acceptance of everything that is happening to people who aren’t you. If you are Catholic, euthanasia is considered suicide and a deadly sin… so, […]

Ask a Genetically-Modified Bio-engineered Super-intelligent Dog, Pt 6

Dear Genetically-Modified Bio-engineered Super-intelligent Dog, Despite my inviting her, my sister-in-law attended my wedding, which I thought was very selfish of her. That was MY DAY. It was SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT ME. But, there she sat in the second row, coyly staying quiet enough to be interesting to all those around her. My friends […]

Why the Price of Insulin Must be Kept Artificially High

[The price of insulin in the United States is many times what it is in other countries. Some see this as just bald profiteering; but, there are actually GOOD reasons why the price of insulin must be inflated:] If it wasn’t expensive, everybody’d want to get diabetes. Because it involves a lot of money, it […]

Are Your Pharmaceuticals Counterfeit?

[Counterfeit medication is a real problem. What you get might be real or it might be something someone made out of Play-doh and red wine. How can you tell your pharms are counterfeit? Here are some warning signs:] The tablet is an odd shape and has the word “Lego” on it. The pharmacist from whom […]

Fun Facts About Vasectomies

A vasectomy will not affect your sexual performance; however, thinking about your vasectomy will kill the mood REAL quick… According to medical professionals, there is no pain after a vasectomy. There might be discomfort, which is doctor-speak for crippling acute pain. Reversing a vasectomy has a forty to ninety percent success rate, depending upon […]