Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
I tried phone-sex only once but I couldn’t figure out where to put the phone. Improvising only made it more unpleasant and a little humiliating… ♥ I once stalked and killed a three-hundred pound big horn sheep… best experience of my LIFE; but, I don’t think I’ll be doing it a second time now that […]
Read More Stuff You Don’t Know about Me“I [hmm] you, too” ♀ “Great! That’s all I need…” ♂ “And, I think you are… good… too?” ♀ “I’m flattered that you feel so strongly about me that you would embarrass both of us like this” ♂ “I love you but not in that way or at all” ♀ “Love is just a chemical […]
Read More Ten Responses to a Premature “I Love You”[This one was just an exercise to see if I could come up with ten. I’m not sure if I succeeded] At least I’ll die doing what I love: Crawling away in terror. At least I’ll die doing what I love: Playing exploding checkers. At least I’ll die doing what I love: Gently scolding members […]
Read More At Least I’ll Die Doing What I LoveThe Autopsy I must say, she took the fact that she destroyed my life and my ability to trust anyone ever again pretty well… almost heroically. But, I mostly blame myself for trusting her. If jealousy is a green-eyed monster, complacency is a different monster probably with different colored eyes. Always assume the worst. That […]
Read More love and other bad ideas, final pt[Part One, Part Two and Part Three here] “You seem distant”, Simone tells me. “Nonsense”, I exclaim from the hallway, “I can still make out your hair color and general build from here” “Is something wrong?” Something? EVERYTHING! I’m trapped, trapped like a rat in a trap or a deer in a sports car. My […]
Read More love and other bad ideas, pt four
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 