Fun Facts About Puerto Rico

Puerto Rico is not a country. It is a territory of the United States, who has a responsibility, when disaster strikes, to provide the Puerto Rican people with all the paper towels they need. Until recently, a large portion of Puerto Rico was used as an artillery range for our navy’s warships. These exercises ensured […]

Some Thoughts on Monopoly

It’s unfair that no one ever goes directly to jail for antitrust violations. The only way to win is to gentrify. Won’t that put your renters out on the street? Yeah, but there are perfectly good shelters and soup kitchens on St. Charles Place. It’s best, if your Filipino friend buys Oriental Avenue, not to […]

Ask a Bio-engineered Super-intelligent Dog, Speed Round

Q. My daughter is pregnant and I’m not happy about it. What should I do? A. Don’t worry. Your daughter’s condition should be back to normal in eight or nine months. If it isn’t, she’s probably just fat. Q. What is a good name for a pet spider? A. “Mr. Spider” Q. That’s not a […]

Insanity, by Calvin Klein

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Quantum physics is doing the same thing in exactly the same way, over and over, and getting one, two or zero results, depending upon whether or not the cat in the box ate the poison. Insanity is doing the same thing […]

Another Mindless Rant

Astronomers keep finding planets around other stars; and, if you believe them, I’ve got a bridge I want to sell you. It’s my bridge… I’ve got a receipt. The guy who owned it didn’t need it anymore because he bought himself a catapult. Most of it is in my backyard, but, I’ve got a few […]