Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
Are bananas good for anxiety? They are, unless you have a morbid fear of bananas. ♦ How can apples benefit you? If you stand next to one, you’ll feel taller. ♦ Do apples cleanse your body? Maybe… but if you’re a cop, you have to tell them, right? ♦ I hear eating two cups of […]
Read More I Answer Google FAQs about FruitSome people fast before going to an all-you-can-eat buffet when just purging in the parking lot is sufficient. ♠ Most people prefer the buffet items that are one row back from the front because those get sneezed on a lot less. ♠ Don’t fill up on bread. If it is a Chinese food buffet, don’t […]
Read More All You Can Eat? Challenge AcceptedFirst, be SURE it was stolen. When I lose something, it usually falls down my pants-leg into my boot. Then, the cat defecates into that boot because I left her alone for a weekend, WITH FOOD AND WATER, but she’s still plenty miffed. If my identity is in that boot, I’ll get myself another, thank […]
Read More Identity TheftYou are sitting at home, reading a book, or, to be more honest, watching a rerun of M*A*S*H and eating half a layer cake, when everything goes dark. Power outage! But, you CAN survive is you remember to do the following: First, make sure you didn’t just blow a fuse. Check your fuse-box. If you […]
Read More So, Your Power is Out…All elevators are equipped with mechanical brakes that will stop the falling elevator just seconds after you soil your pants. ♣ If your elevator is plummeting, try pressing all the buttons. Maybe it will find a floor it likes. ♣ If others are in the elevator while it falls, try to calm them by shrieking […]
Read More So, You’re Elevator is Plummeting…
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 