Gorillas, gorillas, gorillas!

The average gorilla weighs three hundred pounds. The above average gorilla weighs just about the same as that but he earns more and doesn’t spill when he drinks too much. ▼ A gorilla has black fur and is capable of doing a person great harm. Think of the gorilla as a bear but with better […]

Read More Gorillas, gorillas, gorillas!

how to strangle your vulture

So, you bought a vulture… Congratulations! You have purchased a life-long friend, provided you only have ten or so years left to live. Check with your doctor. The novelty of owning a vulture far outweighs the bad-breath and crippling injuries you might suffer from their beaks or talons. And, they can be a godsend should […]

Read More how to strangle your vulture

Why I Must Kill Mice

They are the only animal that attacks using “jump-scares” unless you count that squirrel that lives in my garage. ◙ They leave little rodent turds everywhere and I just bought a two pound box of raisins. ◙ They eat every food in the house except for what is in the mousetraps. ◙ Mice all look […]

Read More Why I Must Kill Mice