Why Ducks Shouldn’t Tap Dance

[I’m not going to tell you who forced me to write on such a ridiculous topic, but her site is right here] It’s frivolous and keeps ducks from doing their real jobs: Selling supplemental health insurance. If they forget to take them off and go home to their ponds afterwards, their tap shoes will drag […]

A Bad Joke, but from the Hart

A veterinarian was complaining to a friend about a patient of his: “I’m treating this stag who has a split personality. He had a hundred thousand personalities when I started treating him; and now, he’s got ten TIMES that” The friend asked if he could see the animal and the vet took him to the […]

It’s Gross Animal Time Again!

The Ornate Facetiousness of the Hammerhead Flatworm

Why is There a Rhinoceros-Shaped Hole in my Wall?

[Okay… this one is “experimental”, which is code for “pretty crappy”. I came up with the title first and then tried to come up with ten items. Don’t read these ’til you’ve had your coffee…] Why is there a rhinoceros-shaped hole in my wall? Because… I bought the wrong pet door. I was holding a […]

I Refuse to Work Hard on this List for Sloth

When people started trying to avoid sinning by staying in bed all day and doing nothing, sloth was added to the deadly sins in a technique known as “damning on the curve”. At monasteries of all religions, idleness is frowned upon. Fortunately, that doesn’t deter really lazy people because they seldom expend the energy to […]