Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
I dream in color, which is a waste because I mostly dream about penguins, zebras or nuns. ֎ Before I go to sleep, I read a few pages in a German dictionary; that way, when I have nightmares, they are in German so I don’t know what’s going on. ֎ I don’t believe much in […]
Read More Perchance to DreamIn dark times such as these, we need a hero… a savior… a man with CRAB CLAWS FOR HANDS. ֍ It would be nice to see the word “carapace” in newspapers again… actually, it would just be nice to see newspapers again. ֍ Maryland needs a super hero to call their own besides John Waters… […]
Read More Why We Need Crabman® More than EverFull Contact Karate: Well… full-contact anything, for that matter. I tried this and found out that, even though the audience can’t hear that kick reverberate through my head, it’s an experience that I’ll never forget… although, if I’d been kicked a little harder I might have… ֍ Drinking Contests: Alcohol is a drug that you […]
Read More Socially Acceptable Ways to Kill YourselfPutting a mirror by the bed. Having sex with a ventriloquist. Making love to a woman who answers to two different names. Copulating on a fresh grave. Sex with one woman who has two heads. Fornicating with a woman who complains incessantly about her sister. Sex with a woman wearing a t-shirt with another woman’s […]
Read More How to Simulate a Menage a TroisDogs: I understand people’s condemnation of dog fighting. We love dogs. Dogs are man’s best friends. But, what if man wants to be entertained by watching two dogs fight to the death? A true friend would step up to the plate, right? I think the biggest problem people have with dog fights is that they […]
Read More Things that Fight for our Amusement
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 