Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
I don’t care what you say: If I tell you what I just mumbled, you WILL be mad… so don’t ask. ♀ If you scratch me behind the ears for fifteen minutes a day, I will never give you a lick of trouble. ♀ If I say, “I love this movie”, it isn’t code for, […]
Read More Advice to My Next WifeTurned out my girlfriend was a werewolf and would change forms with the full moon; I had to break things off with her because I got tired of my neighbor’s cats being eaten every thirty days… ☼ I ended my relationship because I didn’t get along with my girlfriend’s dog. Some dogs get possessive and […]
Read More My Girlf and I broke Up (an exercise)She must have no visible tattoos. Where she might get invisible tattoos is none of my business. ♀ She should think the previous joke was funny… or thought-provoking… or, at least not throw a wrench at me… ♀ She must be tone-deaf; then, I can tell her that I’m a great singer and SHE’LL NEVER […]
Read More What I Look for in a GirlfriendWhen Gertrude Stein said, “A rose is a rose is a rose”. She was only half right. I am deeply, profoundly and possibly in love with you; in fact, I would die for you… I would die twice for you. I wouldn’t die three times for you because people would stop taking me seriously. Your […]
Read More My Love for You: Part OneHold tightly to the one you love. When they stop kicking, stash the body somewhere and find another victim. ♥ Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. Being deeply loved by someone who has bad judgment gives you herpes. ♥ You need nothing more than to be […]
Read More Sage Thinks, Man Blinks, Love Stinks
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 