Random Thoughts: Resurrection

I’ve found that, when I’m having trouble fixing something, the problem usually is that I’m not swearing at it enough. He told me that I was a complete and total fraud… but, I was just PRETENDING to be a fraud… She HUMILIATED me by pulling my pants down at a party… well, actually, I pulled […]

More Rules to Live by

The more arrogant the speaker, the more punchable the face. Two can live as cheaply as one and three quarters. Time really flies when you are about to be executed. It’s an ill wind that blows nobody any good; it’s an iller wind that blows your trash cans into your koi pond. You can catch […]

What Random Thoughts Hath God Wrot?

When I say that Lisa Loeb is the Antichrist, I’m not saying that she’s the evil opposite of Jesus Christ. I’m just saying that she will actively bring about the destruction of the world… I’m done with women because I’ve been burned so many times before… most recently when a lady threw her coffee at […]