So, You’ve Decided to Take Hostages

When you promise to kill a hostage every hour until your demands are met, BE SURE YOU HAVE A WATCH OR OTHER TIME PIECE. There’s nothing more embarrassing than having to ask the authorities what time it is. ● When you give a list of demands, be sure and include, “the right to ask for […]

Another Q and A about Me

What breed of dog is your favorite and why? Actually, that is two questions. I like boxers, because they always have a Harrison Ford-like look of concentration and confusion as if they are trying to figure people out. My big fear is that they will one day lose that expression when they DO figure us […]

So, You’re in a Western Movie and You’ve Been Challenged to a Gunfight

If you are fighting a good guy, don’t worry about it. He’ll either shoot you in the shoulder or the hand so you won’t die until sepsis or gangrene kicks in three days later. ♣ When having a gun-fight, always keep the Sun behind you because why add skin cancer to being shot? ♣ If […]

My Son Made this When He was 13 years old

Almanac: February 5th

The Mexican Constitution was adopted on this day in 1917, by a nice New England couple with a big yard and a swing set. The document set up a Mexican Republic with independent executive, judicial and legislative branches, all working together under a loose affiliation of drug cartels and the Monroe Doctrine. William Burroughs was […]