Short-handed? Here’s Why You Should Hire ROCK MONSTER

Rock Monsters feel no shame, remorse nor empathy making them perfect corporate lawyers. Rock Monsters fear nothing except guys in berets with chisels. When a Rock Monster is about to smash something, it yells, “ROCK MONSTER SMASH!”, which is more warning than your secretary gave when she slapped you with that harassment suit. You can […]

Movies I Hate

Terms of Endearment: A “chick-flick” to end all chick-flicks… if only that were true. As if I needed ANOTHER reason to hate Shirley Maclaine. The lead actress has a voice lower than mine… all the female characters are crazy, adulterous and self righteous and the lead female character dies at the end… YES I SPOILED […]

Things I Hate that are Green

Limes: Lemons’ uglier more bitter brothers. Limes taste pretty bad so they are only used to make something that tastes worse than a lime, taste as good as a lime. And, in that respect, it works for things like Margaritas and Mexican beer. Also, it keeps you from tasting the keys in a key-lime pie… […]

Auto Travel Tips

When traveling long distances make frequent stops and take frequent rests. The stops can be at a restaurant or a rest stop. If there isn’t a lot of traffic, one can take a quick nap behind the wheel between exits. Remember, if you dream about having an accident while sleeping behind the wheel, it might […]

Ask a Genetically-Modified, Bio-Engineered Superintelligent Dog Pt 9

Dear Genetically-Modified Bio-Engineered Super-Intelligent Dog, I’m a perfectionist and my daughter has never lived up to my expectations. I heard that perfectionism is a very bad way to raise a child so I asked her if I had ruined her life. She shrugged and said, “Maybe some”… so I can’t even do THAT right. What […]