Temere Cogitationes (Random Thoughts)

I’ll bet, if you are one of a set of identical twins, you get very tired of people asking, “Do you know who you REALLY remind me of?”… In my opinion, any confession gained under the influence of Wonder Woman’s lasso of truth would be considered coercion by most European and American courts. That’s why […]

What’s Wrong with Redheads?

A redhead spends more on sun block than a coke addict spends on cocaine. A red-headed cocaine addict should be avoided at all costs. Redheads do not go gray… they don’t even age. They just live until they succumb to dermatitis or they suffocate under the weight of their own freckles… The ancient Greeks believed […]

Is Your Daughter’s Teacher a Misogynist?

First, when you use the word “daughter” to describe your offspring, you are assigning gender roles. Tread carefully. Talk to your daughter about the teacher. Explain concepts that she may be unfamiliar with, such as sexism and what an “asshole” is. Misogyny might just be an indicator of early onset dementia or late onset immaturity… […]

Announcement

Well, I have an announcement to make: I’m going to be published again. On paper. In an anthology. It’s a parody of H. P. Lovecraft. I’d love to show it to you all, but sadly I cannot at this point. If you want an idea of what the piece is like, it is slightly less […]