Recent Scientific Discoveries You Might Have Missed

Biologists in Ontario, Canada, using gene splicing and frozen ovum, have created a bear that looks identical to a rabbit; moreover, its DNA also matches that of a rabbit. . An astronomer at Jawaharlal Nehru University has discovered another sun in our solar system. This sun produces no light or heat and has a mass […]

Scents For the Twenty-first Century Nose

Machine Oil and Lemon: The taste of machine oil brings us back to the pre-verbal days when we were teething on refrigerator, stove and dishwasher. But, why the lemon? Because every toddler has been taken to a restaurant and handed a lemon wedge just to watch her face pinch up as she spits it out […]

Remarkably Folksy Advice My Great Grandpappy Gave Me

The Lord loves a working man; but, for some reason, he gives the best cars to the idle rich. . Any problem seems more solvable when you’ve got matches and a can of gasoline. . Women like a proud and confident man; that way, after they break his spirit, they can look back on a […]

The Moon is Blue… and Also Red

I heard that the blue Moon was also going to be a blood Moon on Tuesday, so I was excited to see it. Not excited like a child on Christmas…or, like a dog any day of the year…but, excited. What I stepped out to see ended up being a full moon that looked like every […]

Occupations that Make People Kill

House Painters: House painters, besides being drunks and part-time burglars, murder a LOT of people. Why? Because eggshell is just like cream which is just like snow which looks an awful lot like ivory which we checked and it matched the hat you like so I painted the WHOLE GODDAMNED HOUSE with it so you […]