A Swarm of Locust FAQs

How large are locust swarms? The locust swarms can be up to eighty million locusts in number. To get an idea how large a swarm that is, imagine a single locust; then, imagine eighty million times that. Ṑ How fast can locust swarms move? With a good wind, about twelve mph. If the wind is […]

I AM THE DARKNESS!!!

I am the darkness in that I’m not particularly light. When I see my neighbor, he calls out, “Hey, Charlie… are you still the night?” and I have to remind him that, no, I’m the darkness… because I’M PURE EVIL. Then, the says, “Cool” and invites me over to play cards that night. I accept […]

Deb’s Silly Contest

Deb Whittam’s forty-two word contest is all about film noir. I offer the following: *** “Dirk Ackuddle, Private Investigator”, she said crossing her long legs and lighting a perfumed cigarette, “That’s an odd name” “‘Dirk’ was my mother’s name”, I replied “How about ‘Ackuddle?” “Maybe after we get to know each other better”…

A Wee Little Fish

I didn’t have anything ready for today, so here’s one I did many years ago before I had a website. If you have a beef about it, it’s with old Charlie, not the new Charlie, who is ironically, the older Charlie… The Sapid Deception of the Tiger Oscar

The Symptoms of Canine Panic Disorder (CPD)

Urination: Obviously, not all urination; but, urination where it doesn’t normally occur: Such as the carpet, the stove top or Haiti. Vocalization: As in rapid and/or high-pitch barks or yelps. If the dog vocalizes, “I’m chill, bruh”, it’s probably not panicking and is more likely a surfer. Trembling: Uncontrollable shaking is a sign of CPD. […]