Urination: Obviously, not all urination; but, urination where it doesn’t normally occur: Such as the carpet, the stove top or Haiti.
Vocalization: As in rapid and/or high-pitch barks or yelps. If the dog vocalizes, “I’m chill, bruh”, it’s probably not panicking and is more likely a surfer.
Trembling: Uncontrollable shaking is a sign of CPD. Some drugs might alleviate this symptom but, first use the dog to mix any paint that might need a good shaking. Then, you can say, “Who mixed my Laguna Sunrise Enamel? WHO mixed my Laguna Sunrise Enamel? YOU did. Good boy!”
Unfocused Motor Activity: If your dog has CPD, if might wander about doing things at random… as opposed to a healthy dog, which wanders about doing things at random.
Escape Behavior: A panicking dog might exhibit “escape behavior” such as freeing itself from handcuffs while tied up in a sack that is in a locked chest underwater.
Salivation: Excessive drooling is almost a sure sign of Canine Panic Disorder or bacon.
Freezing Up: If your dog stops moving, it might be exhibiting panic behavior; or, it could simply be a picture of a dog. Check for an artist’s signature in the dog’s bottom right corner…
Destruction: Often, during a panic, a dog will tear up its owner’s possessions; fortunately, there are tranquilizers available that will keep you from caring whatever the hell your dog is doing…
Defecation: Pooping in the house, could be another sign of CPD; or, your dog could just be “trying something new”.
Pacing: This is tricky. Pacing can be a sign of panic in a dog or the dog might simply believe herself to be Groucho Marx. You can test for this by asking the dog if she’s shot an elephant in her pajamas…
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
I misread this at first. I thought it was about teenagers 🙂
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What’s the difference?
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Not much but you did focus upon canines. Have you ever seen a cat????
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I owned a cat for about ten years. She was either very loving or mad as a hatter.
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Could I also use the shaking canine for martinis? Because that would be more helpful than paint…
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You might want to share the martini, after the shaking…
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Excuse me…. have we met?
😈
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My pug is a rescue that suffers from CPD. I do feel bad for her, but the next time she needs any kind of surgery I am going to elect that they remove her bark box as well. I think it will be a good thing for all of us.
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We had a black-mouthed cur that I think had CPD. It didn’t happen often, but there were times when she’d freak out, usually on the bed while playing. Not sure what caused it but it turned out the place we got her from was a puppy mill…
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I’ve never owned a dog that shot an elephant in her pajamas, but I had a greyhound that once drove a bus stark naked. The bus never recovered because it wasn’t covered to begin with..
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I’d buy you a parachute if I thought it wouldn’t open…
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I’m okay with my dog trying new things in the neighbor’s yard rather than the living room.
(We got some weird neighbors…)
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If your neighbors are okay with that, too, then you’ve got some REALLY weird neighbors…
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