I hope that I’m never in a social situation where I have to use the term “vomit comet” more than twice… Anyone who tells you that they would never lie to get sex is deceiving you. I think you know why… Cauliflower is like foreplay: It’s boring and awful but you eat it because of […]Read More Two Sets of Random Thoughts in One Week?
I just saw a commercial for Burger King’s new Crispy Golden Nuggets. I can’t be the only one unnerved by that name and by the fact that they never mentioned what animal they were made from; but, they were a dollar a bag and ten to a bag. The demographic this satisfies is the intersection […]Read More Meat By-Products and Tarzan
The border wall isn’t necessarily a concrete wall or a steel structure… it is a metaphor… a symbol. And, because it is a symbol, we can say for sure that Mexico will be paying all the imaginary money it will take to build that symbol… A border wall will funnel refugees through official check […]Read More Fun Facts About a Border Wall
People who say that there is nothing funny about compound fractures aren’t looking hard enough… After reading Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason, I published my own critique of pure reason. I think that my critique was more effective because I managed to connect pure reason with Stalin, Saddam Hussein and the mafia. Also, I implied […]Read More Random Thoughts on a Snowy Day
[Thanks again to Deb Whittam for the idea] A snake can be used to unstop a kitchen drain should it be clogged with mice or birds. You can use a snake as an alibi. Certainly, it won’t hold the weight of the testimony of a human being; but, no one is going to spend a […]Read More Make No Mistake, there are Uses for a Snake
If your money gets tight and you cannot afford food, maybe fire a member of your staff that you’ve been meaning to get rid of… that insolent chauffeur for example… Yes, your family lives paycheck to paycheck. When there is six months to a year between paychecks you’ll still be living from paycheck to paycheck, […]Read More Donald Trump’s Advice on Weathering a Government Shutdown
One If I had to choose an iconic symbol of my childhood, and I wasn’t allowed to pick that game of old maid I once played with Squeaky Fromme, I would choose the old sycamore tree that stood at the top of Wilson Hill. The tree overlooked Wilson Creek just at the end of Wilson […]Read More Strange Interludes