Signs You Might be Having Too Much Casual Sex

You have repetitive stress disorder in your hips. You spend forty-five minutes awkwardly talking to someone in the dark who turns out to be your pants and a towel and you wonder who you had sex with. You won’t put your address on a job application because you don’t want any emotional blow-back if things […]

Things that are Hard for Me to Hear

I probably COULDN’T take out an armed band of international terrorists using only my wits and karate skills. I may outlive my sex drive by twenty or thirty years. The world is NOT a better place for my mere presence in it. Even though I am godfather to one of my nieces, I still […]

A Pretty Girl is Like Melody

[Another challenge from ISCRIBLR. The word is “melody”, which I misread to “malady” and produced a light opera on the subject. You’ll have to be satisfied with this:] To say that Melody was a pretty girl was an understatement; however, to say she was a very pretty girl was an overstatement. Her attractiveness was in […]

Is Salma Hayek a Werebear?

[In my effort to bring you hard hitting articles on conspiracies that hide just beneath the surface of our lives, I bring you this one: Does Salma Hayek turn into a brown bear when the moon is full? Truth is stranger than fiction] Salma Hayek is five foot two; but, when she stands on her […]

How to Stop Procrastinating

Read the autobiographies of people who accomplish things. Do they procrastinate? No! They work, play golf, sail their yachts and, when the time came for them to write their autobiography, they proactively hired a ghost writer. So, read their lives and absorb their message whenever you get around to it. Make sure all of your […]