Stuff and Junk

I’ve written things that were masterpieces but not “beloved masterpieces”. Because the only works they get the designation as “beloved” are children’s books. Why? Because if children love a book you’ll know it because they’ll demand you read it to them over and over and OVER until you finally FREAK OUT and replace its ending […]

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Insul-pliments

I’m not saying that you suck. I’m just saying that, if I had to make a list of people who didn’t suck, you wouldn’t be on it… She’s a handsome woman with a great personality. He’s a quiet unassuming man who doesn’t look very much like a pedophile. He’s a man who goes through a […]

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Fun Facts About the Penis

Freud was right about penis envy. Women did envy them in the nineteenth century because those who had them had most of the wealth, power and, of course, penises… Never elect a president with a small penis or you may end up spending a trillion dollars on a long and hard wall at your southern […]

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