Thoughts are Acorns to the Squirrels in My Head

How long do you have to wait between breaking and entering before they are considered two different charges? Like, if you kick in someone’s door, then come back a week later to rob them? I followed the Brett Kavanaugh hearing VERY closely, heard both sides of the argument, but I still don’t think he should […]

Halloween Tips

Make your children’s costumes as dark as possible so that drivers cannot purposely run them over. Sexy costumes have a time and a place. The place is a party comprised of adults. The time is when you aren’t three hundred pounds, bald and with a rash down the lower half of your body. There is […]

How Can I Be a Trump Supporter?

If you can consider your soy bean farm successful, thanks to Trump, despite the fact that you aren’t making any money and someone else owns it, now. You have to be able to believe that a man who attended Christian church for decades is a Muslim; and, a man who wouldn’t know a church if […]

Why Wind Power, Like What My Baby Did, is a Bad Bad Thing

If the big wind turbine companies use up all of our wind, Americans will be deprived of a basic human right: A nice breeze. If we burn fewer hydrocarbons, people will have to start taking supplements to get the carbon monoxide their bodies need. In the United States, wind tends to blow in from West […]

Signs You Might Have Too Much Sodium in Your Diet

Your favorite sandwich is anchovies between two pieces of beef jerky. Half the time you give a blood sample, the vial explodes off of the needle and embeds itself into a wall. Your stool makes an effective salt lick. You’ve switched from a salt-shaker to a tablespoon Your friends and family won’t eat any baked […]