Raggedy Ann is Trying to Kill Me!

Before I went to bed, it was on the right side of the shelf. When I woke up, it was on the right side of the shelf but it LOOKED as if it had gone somewhere else and then just come back. I think it was the fact that her hand had been stamped for […]

Why I’m Mad

I get mad when someone puts the milk back in the fridge with only a few drops in it. If it turns out it was me, I still get mad but I keep it to myself… I get mad because youth is wasted on the young; but, anyone can get old age if they are […]

Occupations that Make People Kill

House Painters: House painters, besides being drunks and part-time burglars, murder a LOT of people. Why? Because eggshell is just like cream which is just like snow which looks an awful lot like ivory which we checked and it matched the hat you like so I painted the WHOLE GODDAMNED HOUSE with it so you […]