Why I’m Mad

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I get mad when someone puts the milk back in the fridge with only a few drops in it. If it turns out it was me, I still get mad but I keep it to myself…

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I get mad because youth is wasted on the young; but, anyone can get old age if they are willing to wait…

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I get mad when someone tailgates me while I’m tailgating someone. Because, someone could get hurt.

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I get mad when I go to the grocery store for a bottle of lemon juice and end up spending over a hundred dollars, taking the groceries home and realizing I forgot the lemon juice.

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I get mad at all the injustice in the world… but, I do it alphabetically, so I never quite get around to being angry about zebra murder.

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I get mad at the family next door because their children are illiterate; but, they still haven’t reacted to my strongly-worded notes.

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I used to get mad because I had to walk on egg shells around my old girlfriend… weirdest fetish ever…

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I get mad at people who have different opinions than I do, despite my efforts to convince them with logic, reason, threats, sarcasm and free-verse poetry.

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I get mad when a fish eats the worm off of my hook because, if I’d known that was going to happen, I could’ve given that worm to a hungry robin. Plus, it means I was outsmarted by a fish.

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I get mad when something wakes me in the middle of the night and it isn’t Catherine Zeta-Jones.

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I get mad when there’s nothing good enough to watch on television and there’s nothing on so bad that I can enjoy it ironically…

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I used to get mad when I saw parents hitting their children in public because my children would see that and think I was weak…

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21 thoughts on “Why I’m Mad

      1. Have you ever tried to kill and elephant? There’s a reason they are called “elephants” and that reason is because they are as big as elephants…

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    1. You aren’t wrong. I remember fishing for trout all day, once… and I caught nothing. I went back home to find that trout had moved in, changed the locks and filed liens on my property. I’m telling you… It’s catfish from here on in…

      Liked by 2 people

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