I Have the Foresight to Talk about the Hubble Telescope

January 1994: The Mystery Nebula: That’s right, the Hubble Telescope discovered a nebula that DOESN’T LOOK LIKE ANYTHING. They tried mixing it in with Rorschach Tests and still not one person could come up with anything… except the “Stabbing Horses with a Syringe Nebula”… August 1994: Planet X: This is a mysterious object that has […]

I Give You All Manner of Silverware Etiquette

A good rule of thumb is to use the silverware furthest from your plate first. This is usually the shrimp fork at the plate of the person at the table near the kitchen. A salad fork has longer tines and a shorter handle than a dinner fork. This allows the diner to comb his hair […]

I Tell You What You Can Do with Lemons

Get eight of them together and hold a lemon party. Step on one and hold a lemon funeral. Walk into a pet store with a lemon in your hands and shout angrily, “The wings fell off of this canary you sold me!” Always keep lemons in your refrigerator and they’ll keep you informed of any […]

I was a Human Guinea Pig for the FBI!

Okay, you need money and you’ve already sold one of your kidneys, one of your lungs and one of your livers. You’ve sold plasma to a blood banks and you’ve sold sperm to what might or might not have been a sperm bank. And, you STILL need money because those HORSES ARE NOT GOING TO […]

I’d Love if this Set of Tennis Facts Matched Your Expectations

The game of tennis originated in the Middle Ages. It was played indoors with the ball being hit with the flat of the hand. Historians agree that the game was as loud as it is today but with a lot less racket… A score of zero in tennis is designated by the word “love”. The […]