10-40-400-40-10: Bottles of Screams

I think as I lie on my lawn at night. About the stars and are there people on the planets that circle them and are they lying on their lawns wondering about me and my lawn; and, I wonder if any of those creatures is lying face-down as I am. Then, it occurs to me […]

Letter ‘A’: Science

Atmosphere: Earth’s atmosphere consists of the exosphere, thermosphere, mesosphere, stratosphere and troposphere. If you go any lower than the troposphere, you will undoubtedly start scraping up against asphalt. Earth’s atmosphere extends about six thousand miles from her surface. In the outer most exosphere, atoms and molecules can travel hundreds of miles without colliding with another […]

Fire Extinguisher Instructions Written By:

Drill Instructor: Pull safety ring from trigger What are you doing? We’ve got women can do that better than you. From now on your fire extinguisher’s name is “Janet” Step back and spray burning area Now, you will do fifty pushups! Donald Trump: Pull safety ring from trigger You know firemen saw me handling a […]

What Can You Do with a Railroad Spike

Railroad spikes are very effective in killing robot vampires. ♠ Bend a spike into a ‘U’ if you want to staple 45000 or more sheets of paper together. Apply with a sledgehammer. ♠ Heat a railroad spike up to 2500 degrees to accomplish any task that requires a dangerously hot pointed object. ♠ If you […]

Almanac: January 15th

Playwright Moliere was born on this day in 1622 in whatever part of Paris it was that people got born in. His full body of work includes tragedies, comedies, farces, tragicomedies, farcitragedies and farcitragedcomedies. His works have been translated into every living language and Visual Basic. When you read Moliere, you will have the unmistakable […]