Advice My Grandpappy Gave Me Part 2

Women are not all vengeful harpies out to drain your life-essence and leave you a broken defeated shell… not all of them… theoretically… Never spend more than you can afford. “What you can afford” is equal to your take home salary plus whatever credit is left on your cards plus the card limits of credit […]

Ask a Super-intelligent Bio-engineered Dog

[After seeing the popularity of Dear Prudence, Dear Abby, Dear Meg and Ask Amy, I had to ask myself, “Is writing a fake advice column for me?”. Not having anything else written for today, the answer came back, “Yeah, why not?”] Dear Super-intelligent Bio-engineered Dog, I’m currently in a long-distance relationship and I’m worried that […]

Girlfs that are Nightmarfs

[Author’s Note: If any of my female readers would like to post a list of boyf-types to avoid, I’ll gladly let you guest-blog it here; moreover, I will personally administer my special guest-blogger tattoo to any part of you that you don’t mind having a walrus fighting a host of butterflies. If I get offended […]

Sciences that Should be Gotten Rid of

Forestry: I’m not sure which is more surprising: That they have a special branch of science for botanists who don’t have the ability to interact with other humans; or, that ALL botanists aren’t included in that group. Usually, when someone tells you that they have a degree in forestry, the next thing they say to […]

Tips to Quit Smoking

Assure yourself that you CAN quit, as you have done it so many times before. Quitting smoking can be stressful. There are many ways to alleviate this stress, but the most effective method is to start smoking again. Sometimes, quitting smoking is just a matter of changing habits. Do you smoke on your way […]