Why I Burned the Mall to the Ground

[I’ve been having trouble writing so you’ll get THIS and LIKE it] Because I hate the word “kiosk”… ☼ Old people spend their mornings walking in the mall rather than doing their job: Telling young people everything that is wrong with their generation. ☼ Ever since the pet stores stopped selling puppies, I’ve spent my […]

Read More Why I Burned the Mall to the Ground

Wealth of Notions

If we ever go to an all-barter economy, gynecologists are going to have a rough time in retail establishments. € I used to make tiny gold bars out of scrap jewelry and kept them in a little bowl. In no time, I’d amassed a small fortune… € I broke a quarter into three pieces and […]

Read More Wealth of Notions

Insul-pliments

I’m not saying that you suck. I’m just saying that, if I had to make a list of people who didn’t suck, you wouldn’t be on it… She’s a handsome woman with a great personality. He’s a quiet unassuming man who doesn’t look very much like a pedophile. He’s a man who goes through a […]

Read More Insul-pliments

Why I’m Sad

I’m sad when a tv series that I like ends because I can no longer follow the made up events in the lives of people who don’t exist. I get sad when one of my favorite actors or actresses dies. Personally, I always felt as if Don Knotts and Tim Conway had one more epic […]

Read More Why I’m Sad

A Pretty Girl is Like Melody

[Another challenge from ISCRIBLR.  The word is “melody”, which I misread to “malady” and produced a light opera on the subject.  You’ll have to be satisfied with this:] To say that Melody was a pretty girl was an understatement; however, to say she was a very pretty girl was an overstatement. Her attractiveness was in […]

Read More A Pretty Girl is Like Melody