The Blood-less Chicanery of the Vampire Bat

Vampire bats are given a bad rap. Sure they are ugly… so ugly that you cannot help but think it is on purpose; and, they DO take blood from people and animals, while they are still using it; and, they carry rabies… which isn’t so bad but the same bats insist on also SHARING rabies. […]

Why I Keep Bats in My Laundry Room

I might meet a woman who is turned on by rabies. My son needs a pet and he’s a night-person. Because there’s a perfectly good ceiling that no one was using. If you know a better way of getting rid of laundry mosquitoes I’d like to hear it. If I ever feel that the Covid […]

Medical Advice from a Terse Llama: Covid Edition

Dear Terse Llama, With all the Covid 19 going around, I’ve managed to stay pretty healthy; however, lately I’ve been feeling as if I might be a carrier. I just haven’t felt myself; plus, the other morning, I woke up in the ocean with fighter planes landing on my deck. Should I get tested? Confused […]

Why I Built a House on the North Pole

Every window has a southern exposure. My nearest neighbor will feel compelled to bring me a house warming gift and my nearest neighbor will be Santa Claus. I’ll save a fortune on air conditioning. After a few more decades of global warming, I’ll be able to grow mangoes in my backyard. Six months of darkness […]