Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
Keith Richards insured his hands for 1.6 million dollars despite the fact that Keith Richards’ hands had recently filed a restraining order to keep the guitarist five hundred feet away from his hands at all times. ☺ Jennifer Lopez has a 27 million dollar policy to insure her buttocks. When she hits sixty, her plan […]
Read More Famous People Who’ve Insured parts of ThemselvesCome When Called: This is probably the first thing you’ll try to teach a dog. REMEMBER: Smart dogs do NOT come when they are called. They are exploring the world. Why should the dog come to you when you call it? It already KNOWS what you smell like. Heel: Training a dog not to move […]
Read More Thoughts on Dog TricksDear Genetically-Modified, Bio-Engineered Super-Intelligent Dog, Can you play dead? And, are you a good dog? Who’s a good dog? WHO’S a good DOG? Enthusiastic in Jasto Dear Jasto, Good and evil are subjective constructs; however, I did fake my death in Cancun seven years ago for the insurance money. Dear Genetically-Modified, Bio-Engineered Super-Intelligent Dog, I […]
Read More Ask a Genetically-Modified, Bio-Engineered Super-Intelligent Dog, Part ?11218 North South Street: Suspect was apprehended trying to activate a small light bulb with acid and two dissimilar metals. He was later charged with battery. Police broke up what appeared to be a silent riot at the Mahon Public Library but it later turned out to be a rumble between two factions of […]
Read More Police Blotter of East WestriverburgI buy fifty cd-roms a week so I can eventually backup the entire internet. I’m creating a snack food laced with barbiturates called Laze Potato Chips. I’m hollowing out birch seeds so that, when they are grown, I’ll have a ready-made canoe. I’m falsifying my driver’s license to match my falsified birth certificate. I’m shaving […]
Read More What is Charlie Up to?
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 