Look at the Bright Side (an Exercise)

Look on the bright side: You can start fresh with a new dog; one that won’t chew on the extension cord.

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Look at the bright side: You survived the car crash… which means God has higher plans for you… or he hasn’t finished torturing you…

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She said she wouldn’t go out with you if you were the last man on Earth; so, look at the bright side: Now that you know that, you can abandon your plan to kill every man on Earth…

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So, an adult sex shop has moved next door to your store. Look at the bright side: It probably means a lot more business for your raincoat and dark glasses emporium.

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So, you’re barren and can’t have children? Look at the bright side: If you get pregnant, you’ll at least know the baby isn’t yours…

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She dumped you? Look at the bright side: There are plenty of fish in the sea. Of course, all THOSE fish have girlfriends so they aren’t going to want to hang out with you.

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Losing your short-term memory? Look at the bright side: At least you aren’t losing your short-term memory.

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So, a bear tore your face and chest open? Look at the bright side: The massive scars are still more dignified than getting a tattoo…

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So, you found out your girlfriend is just pretending to be sick to avoid seeing you. Look on the bright side: Now you can stop pretending to care how she feels.

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Look at the bright side: You won the “who can hold the cherry bomb the longest” competition. Victories like that are hard-won and you can’t easily count them on the fingers of one hand… at least not anymore…