Facts About Opium Dens that Hardly Hurt at All

Despite its name, an opium den seldom had a reclining couch and big-screen television.

Pillows at an opium den were often wooden “pillows” which makes sense when you remember that opium keeps you from feeling pain.

Often, in that hard pillow would be a compartment for your valuables. This was important because no one wanted some stranger stealing his money and making bad life decisions with it.

Opium has no calories, making it perfect for fit, high-powered young executives who enjoy falling asleep in alleys and under bridges.

Nineteenth century Australia, thanks to immigration, saw a startling number of opium dens. Don’t find 811 startling? Then, you must be dead inside.

An opium den was where you deposited the drugged up and forgotten… making it indistinguishable from a modern-day nursing home.

At the turn of the century, opium dens were made illegal and shut down; because, who wants to look at a depressing bunkhouse full of addicts when you drive to work in the morning, when you can encounter them a little at a time, in libraries, under bridges and in public restrooms?

Never ask what time it is in an opium den; because, there is always some joker who calls out, “time for more opium!”…

In an opium den, even if someone LOOKS like they want to pillow-fight, it’s best to get verbal consent before starting.

New York City’s last opium den was shut down in 1957. The addicts were arrested. The owner went on to run a string of nursing homes.