Olio, Scraps, Ort, Hodgepodge and Other Floor Sweepings

We did a blind taste test but it turns out they pretty much taste like sighted people… The problem with the adage, “Winners write the history books” is that it implies that, somehow, historians are “winners”… Donald Trump is as honest as the day is long… not a day on this planet but on one […]

Taste Treats of my Youth that Weren’t

Canned Peaches: These were for people who wanted peaches all year round AND wanted them to be slimier. They had an almost sentient ability to avoid being cut up with your spoon. Uncut, you’d have to chase them around the bowl until your mom turned her head and then GRAB ‘EM AND STUFF ‘EM IN […]

Employ these Methods of Not Getting Fired

Make it an EEOC Thing: Convince your boss that you are a Bi Cherokee handicapped veteran and he will never be able to fire you for fear of discrimination claims. They know that, if they do fire you, they can be sued by all five of you. Do the Dirty Jobs: Volunteer for every task […]

Responses to “I Want to See Your Manager”

“Okay, but he is deaf in one ear and has superhuman hearing in the other, so if you yell, it will make him run in circles” “We have no manager… just a council of the elders that meets every full moon” “Our manager has been dead for twenty years. You can only talk to him […]

I Go Catty: Some Theories on Melania Trump

She is a ventriloquist and must always be within arm’s length of the hole in Trump’s back. She is a sex-doll brought to life by a fairy. She will become a real girl after she performs a selfless grand task. We’ll keep you posted. Melania Trump speaks no English and precious little Russian. She ended […]