Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes
Funnier than a sharp stink in your eye…
[Thanks to Rivergirl for the idea] You lost your “Box o’ Farts” and your singing bass trophy just isn’t that funny anymore. ☺ There are few things more relaxing than the sounds of agony coming from a barnyard animal. ☺ You need a gift for someone who has everything and whose guts you also hate. […]
Read More Reasons to Buy a Screaming Goat ToyGeorge Washington was born in Westmoreland County Virginia on February 22nd, 1732. His parents had no idea he’d be the man to change the world… although they did suspect it after fending off those British Terminators sent from the future. ♣ Washington inherited his first slave at the age of eleven. By the time he […]
Read More Phirst Phounding Phathers PhactsIt has been a while since I’ve written an all-hands general memo. Last month, I and the other executives, went to an intensive compressed one-week management training and I couldn’t write the memo because I contracted syphilis. Summer is upon us again. Keep in mind, while you are out having fun, safety is still your […]
Read More The Summer MemoSulfur has 23 isotopes, four of which are stable and two of which are known to drunk text their exes. ♣ Sulfur is created inside of massive stars by fusing Helium and Silicon. If you want to make Sulfur at home, make sure your oven gets as hot as 2.5 billion degrees Kelvin and maybe […]
Read More Facts on SulfurI’ve never pulled off the perfect con; in fact, I’ve never even been able to convince anyone that I’m actually sick when I call in sick. ☼ I’ve never finished my version of Duchamp’s Nude Descending a Staircase because I can’t convince anyone to take off their clothes and walk down my stairs. ☼ I’ve […]
Read More Things I Have Yet to Accomplish
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 