Vitamin-Enriched Flour WILL DESTROY US ALL

First, it was fluoridation in the 1960’s that threatened to turn us all into communists and was known to have turned at least four Americans into Devo. Then, it was mandatory seat belts that threatened to turn men into wimps and women into some ungodly female Devo. Now, it is vitamin-fortified flour. It is REAL. […]

Double Happy Family Fun List with Prawns

I am not one to rest on my laurels, mostly because I am allergic to shrubs. You know, if you took the roof off of a planetarium, the view wouldn’t change at all… I’d laugh at people who consult psychics or use horoscopes to make decisions; but, I realized a long time ago that they […]

Fun Facts About Vasectomies

A vasectomy will not affect your sexual performance; however, thinking about your vasectomy will kill the mood REAL quick… According to medical professionals, there is no pain after a vasectomy. There might be discomfort, which is doctor-speak for crippling acute pain. Reversing a vasectomy has a forty to ninety percent success rate, depending upon […]

Why I Prefer Baths to Showers

[Okay… I’m not crazy about this one but I’m tired of looking at it in my queue. So many partially finished pieces…] In a shower, you cannot watch your genitals gently sway with the current like a reef-dwelling anemone… Showers wash the dirt and filth directly off of you and down the drain. A bath […]

Signs that You’ve Just Given Up

In every new Minecraft game, you don’t build anything or mine stuff. You just wander out into the water, ala A Star is Born, and drown over and over. You start calling your children by the same name because what’s the difference? You start listening to ska. You watch the Weather Channel all day […]