Extra-Galactic Planets and Peanut Butter

Well, you knew it was gonna happen but I’ll bet you didn’t think it would happen so soon. No, I’m NOT talking about a general anesthesia that also has the great taste of peanut butter, although that IS on the horizon. I’m not talking about the cure for cancer which might’ve been announced last week; […]

Recent Scientific Discoveries You Might Have Missed

Biologists in Ontario, Canada, using gene splicing and frozen ovum, have created a bear that looks identical to a rabbit; moreover, its DNA also matches that of a rabbit. . An astronomer at Jawaharlal Nehru University has discovered another sun in our solar system. This sun produces no light or heat and has a mass […]

Scents For the Twenty-first Century Nose

Machine Oil and Lemon: The taste of machine oil brings us back to the pre-verbal days when we were teething on refrigerator, stove and dishwasher. But, why the lemon? Because every toddler has been taken to a restaurant and handed a lemon wedge just to watch her face pinch up as she spits it out […]

Remarkably Folksy Advice My Great Grandpappy Gave Me

The Lord loves a working man; but, for some reason, he gives the best cars to the idle rich. . Any problem seems more solvable when you’ve got matches and a can of gasoline. . Women like a proud and confident man; that way, after they break his spirit, they can look back on a […]

Occupations that Make People Kill

House Painters: House painters, besides being drunks and part-time burglars, murder a LOT of people. Why? Because eggshell is just like cream which is just like snow which looks an awful lot like ivory which we checked and it matched the hat you like so I painted the WHOLE GODDAMNED HOUSE with it so you […]