Remarkably Folksy Advice My Great Grandpappy Gave Me

The Lord loves a working man; but, for some reason, he gives the best cars to the idle rich.

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Any problem seems more solvable when you’ve got matches and a can of gasoline.

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Women like a proud and confident man; that way, after they break his spirit, they can look back on a job well done…

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Pigs are one of the smarter animals; but, they still haven’t found a way to keep from being delicious.

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Someone has asked for a volunteer. How do you know if you should? Well, ask yourself, is this job so onerous and thankless that it requires a volunteer? If so, don’t.

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If you read a book a week, you will be a better man. If you write a book a week, you will be Stephen King.

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Do what you love. Because someday watching television and masturbating will be a viable career…

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Look at the birds and the beasts in the forest. They don’t worry or strive. And, everyday, more and more of them are extinct.

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What a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive! And, that tangled web will keep people from figuring out that you were the one who lied.

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Today is the first day of the rest of your life. If that depresses you, you are not alone…

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