Still Still More Advice from my Great Grandpappy

It’s best to avoid renting an apartment that has the term “urine-soaked” anywhere in the description. Never buy hamburger from a bad-tempered butcher. The rule of thumb is: For every two zucchini plants you grow, you should make one new friend who really likes eating zucchini. If your landlord stops by to pick up the […]

The First Things I’ll Do After Covid

Kiss the first person I see, on the mouth, like that sailor from that famous photograph taken on VJ Day. Shave. Put my pants on. Actually, I should probably do THAT BEFORE I kiss the first person I see, on the mouth, like that sailor from that famous photograph taken on VJ Day. I will […]

Ask a Genetically-Modified Bio-Engineered Super-Intelligent Dog: The Final Epilogue

Dear Genetically-Modified Bio-Engineered Super-Intelligent Dog, Despite my prohibition against pets, my son found a stray beatnik while playing with friends in a vacant lot a few blocks away. We kept him in the garage and nursed him back to health with cups of espresso; but, now that he’s better, he refuses to leave. He just […]

Your Astronomy Test

Note that this test will count for one-fifth of your grade. Your best test will count twice and your worst test grade will be dropped. If you can calculate your grade before I post it, you get an automatic ‘A’; unfortunately, that ‘A’ will be dropped and your worst grade will be counted twice, so […]

What’s the Deal with Uranus?

What is the DEAL with Uranus??? It sits out there, seven planets out, disappointing astronomers everywhere; that is why NO astronomer willingly specializes in Uranus… just like no doctor enters medical school wanting to specialize in feet; but, SOMEONE has to treat maladies of the feet, just like SOMEONE has to put together everything we […]