Greatest Advances in Medicine

Trepanning: When a caveman got hurt, they were pretty ineffectual… yelling, “Do something! Anything!”. And, trepanning definitely counts as “anything”. Trepanning is the act of boring into the skull, which most people needed like a hole in the head. What’s most surprising is not that early man bored holes in the cranium to treat conditions […]

The Harbinger of Spring

When you see a robin, you know that spring is on its way… just like when you see your grandmother grabbing her car keys, you know that a big car accident is about to happen. There are other ways of determining if spring is near: Use a calendar, ask a friend… I hear the internet […]

Lessons Learned From Fighting the Borg

I know now that the kids who used drugs were not cool… just cooler than the ones who didn’t… Treating other people with the same respect I would want for myself turned out to be a great way to trick idiots into doing what I wanted. Someone once told me, “Do what you love and […]

Thoughts on Cooking

When a chef burns something the term for that is “caramelization”. They say you can substitute a quarter cup of applesauce for an egg when cooking; but, I’ve found it makes a pretty uninspiring omelet. Cut tough meat across the grain. You’ll know which way the grain goes because it will always be the direction […]

Books By Successful Authors that Failed Utterly

The Da Vinci Cod by Dan Brown: Symbologist Robert Langdon scours the western world for a fish whose face looks like the Mona Lisa. The fish supposedly grants wishes. A shadowy albino character also seeks the elusive magic fish… with the intent to KEEP WISHING FOR MORE WISHES. The climax of the book was so […]