Still More Leftovers

I Published Cooking with Your Children but a lot of people were way off in what the book was about. ☺ Because lips are sensitive, even a mild blow can cause bruising or even death… if you meet up with some nut that gets enraged at the sight of bruised lips. ☺ My old girlfriend […]

What it Means to be a REAL Man

It means we will react violently if we feel insulted enough. Oddly enough, how insulted we feel is inversely proportional to how big and scary the guy insulting us is… It means that we will NEVER ask for directions, use a map or follow street signs. We navigate like our fathers did: By driving around […]

Olio and Hodgepodge

I wouldn’t want to be a special envoy because the other envoys might get jealous and maybe vandalize my truck. My mom always liked me best but covered up for it by spending all her time playing with and complimenting my siblings. Ever notice that astronauts don’t get arrested a lot for murder, rape and […]

Fun Facts about Independence Day

When Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence, he left the names of the two nations blank so that, if the American Revolution fizzled out, he could sell the document to Ireland. A big part of celebrating how independent we are is buying hundreds of millions of dollars worth of fireworks from China. Only two […]

Things that Make Me Feel Less Masculine

[another post that I was never totally thrilled with… so, now it’s YOUR problem] Holding a purse for someone. Having the song, “Barbie Girl” stuck in my head. Doing what some stupid sign tells me to do. High voltage, my ass! Sherbet. Foot long hot dogs… Eight inch hot dogs Any hot dog. Not being […]