Any dog named after Satan or one of his minions.
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The all-powerful jackal-headed god of death and dismemberment. Sure, he LOOKS reasonable enough but why take a chance?
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That guy over there with the big stick.
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A litigation lawyer… or ANY lawyer for that matter. Remember: Shakespeare said, “Kill all the lawyers” but he never told us HOW…
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Anyone with the nickname “Low Impulse-Control Eddie”.
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Whoever spends any time alone with the food you eat.
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A Giant Canadian Goose… or any other Canadian giant. Andre the Giant comes to mind…
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Any witness to a felony that you may or MAY NOT have committed…
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Pre-teens carrying eggs.
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Door-to-door grenade salesmen…
Potatoes and the Promise of More Potatoes 
You forgot cats C
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Well THAT goes without saying, Deb…
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I drew a cool cat picture this week
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Never piss off a goose. Those birds don’t mess around, they will flat out hurt you.
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I say, BRING IT ON!
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You realize geese used to guard distilleries in Scotland… right?
“For rather than humans or guard dogs, the role of protecting the Ballantine’s Whisky storehouses from 1959 to 2012 was performed by a famous ‘secure goose squad’ known as the Scotch Watch…and they were so good as their jobs that no-one ever stole a drop.”
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I will admit: Drunks do not fare well against geese…
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I avoid irritating my spouse….
Or else, she calls me a louse.
And if I don’t let it pass,
She kicks me in the ass.
So, on restraint, I do depend
To avoid getting it in the end.
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They’ll kick us in the butts and call us a “lummox”
If we wear our hat backwards, they’ll kick us in the stomachs…
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Don’t give up your day job to become a poet, bro. 👌
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That IS my day job…
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Don’t even LOOK at preteens carrying eggs…
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They’re just little snipers looking for targets…
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You are inspiring! Never cross the DMV or they will NEVER call your number!
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Or, they’ll give you an irrational number but only call out integers…
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Well, how was I to know that nickname actually meant what it said? I didn’t even suspect that he was gonna do ANY of that stuff, I swear! And he told me that was a BADMINTON SET he had in the gym bag…
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and scorpios too !
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