Amputee Pony-girl Gone Bad

To Whom It May Concern: I have been considering working in the genre of erotic fiction for some time now. Lately, it has become even more imperative that I “branch out” so to speak because my current employment appears to be on shaky ground. There are cut-backs, the economy is bad and, every so often, […]

How a Pirate is Better than a Handball

⇒A pirate sails the wide-open seas… a world with no boundaries… horizon as far as the eye can see. A handball lives in a can. ⇒You can slam a handball into a wall thousands of times; whereas, a pirate would object after hitting the wall only twice. ⇒Pirates had a code… rules they had to […]

Why Roll-on Deodorant is the Best (or, Why I Need to Stop Getting List Ideas in the Bathroom)

1: Roll-on deodorant adds to your total time spent performing arm-pit massage. 2: Spray deodorant makes a hissing noise. Roll-on deodorant is silent so as not to wake up your toilet… 3: Roll-on deodorant can be unscrewed from its container and, in a pinch, be used as a bright green decoration on a birthday cake. […]

Animals Whose Balls You Can Cut Off

Sheep: A castrated sheep is called a “wether” which must be a Welsh term for “mutilated”. A wether starts off as a kid wandering around, minding his own business (whatever THAT might be). Suddenly, a farmer grabs him and slices his balls off. Reason? It makes the sheep healthier. I can agree with that because, […]

Types of Art that Should Have Never Been, Part the First

Pointillism Have you ever wanted the world to look more like a test for color-blindness? You know, the irregular dots of color in which you can detect a number or letter UNLESS God had cursed you with color-blindness. Remember the anxiety the first time you saw one? You were pretty sure you DIDN’T have […]